If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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