Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
