Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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