3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
