We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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