i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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