I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
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