i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
