she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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