make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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