We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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