What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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