So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
