This is not my ceiling
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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