People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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