Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Randomize
