...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
