I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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