My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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