so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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