we have pet lesbian snakes
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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