I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
