i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
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