I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Acid is not a monday night drug
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Randomize
