You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
You ruined the universe
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
