i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
