my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
