I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I skipped work to stalk him.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
