Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
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