I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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