That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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