Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): No more parties with babies... I can't do that again. http://tfl.nu/7ry4
  Replies (10) Good night (671) Bad night (2819)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up. http://tfl.nu/laen
  Replies (13) Good night (3440) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die. http://tfl.nu/91t8
  Replies (23) Good night (553) Bad night (3820)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after? http://tfl.nu/ai6n
  Replies (45) Good night (1121) Bad night (5274)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us? http://tfl.nu/e7z7
  Replies (13) Good night (5113) Bad night (1337)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve. http://tfl.nu/a52b
  Replies (2) Good night (2224) Bad night (1455)
• Favorite

  (094): View more from

  After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (094): After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while. http://tfl.nu/x4in
  Replies (3) Good night (2730) Bad night (871)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop. http://tfl.nu/phgu
  Replies (7) Good night (2591) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster http://tfl.nu/uote
  Replies (5) Good night (1750) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Let's just rave with boners that last for hours

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Let's just rave with boners that last for hours http://tfl.nu/lox1
  Replies (27) Good night (1724) Bad night (1019)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter... http://tfl.nu/2dxo
  Replies (10) Good night (1537) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult. http://tfl.nu/x3id
  Replies (1) Good night (1557) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now. http://tfl.nu/89m6
  Replies (5) Good night (2649) Bad night (413)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message. http://tfl.nu/tlvz
  Replies (1) Good night (574) Bad night (272)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.

  (1+61): View more from

  Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek. (1+61): Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before? http://tfl.nu/tcy4
  Replies (11) Good night (1794) Bad night (203)

Randomize