Texts From Last Night

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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.

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  (405): Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile. http://tfl.nu/zkhz
  Replies (30) Good night (812) Bad night (3265)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.

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  (813): Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear. http://tfl.nu/hyjr
  Replies (20) Good night (730) Bad night (6481)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?

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  (704): I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this? http://tfl.nu/q6uf
  Replies (44) Good night (6404) Bad night (738)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  stop calling my apartment porn island.

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  (678): stop calling my apartment porn island. http://tfl.nu/7ji0
  Replies (15) Good night (4920) Bad night (704)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever

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  (314): so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever http://tfl.nu/0876
  Replies (18) Good night (3039) Bad night (596)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break

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  (301): she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break http://tfl.nu/l0jq
  Replies (19) Good night (5368) Bad night (1250)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar

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  (202): the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar http://tfl.nu/f2lj
  Replies (6) Good night (5054) Bad night (1450)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.

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  (303): dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered. http://tfl.nu/j70b
  Replies (10) Good night (7712) Bad night (1121)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.

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  (239): In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now. http://tfl.nu/wa2b
  Replies (32) Good night (9367) Bad night (1750)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  I don't understand but I'll be there in 5

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  (860): Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt? (1-860): I don't understand but I'll be there in 5 http://tfl.nu/rms0
  Replies (7) Good night (3338) Bad night (706)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom

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  (860): at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom http://tfl.nu/ajul
  Replies (3) Good night (1904) Bad night (572)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.

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  (913): You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic. http://tfl.nu/rxwg
  Replies (4) Good night (1098) Bad night (473)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.

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  (519): My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning. http://tfl.nu/s24c
  Replies (19) Good night (3636) Bad night (620)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.

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  (406): I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever. http://tfl.nu/7tpa
  Replies (1) Good night (483) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  you take my contact solution?

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.

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  (248): you take my contact solution? (1-248): drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride. http://tfl.nu/mr4a
  Replies (4) Good night (287) Bad night (631)

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