how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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