Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
