i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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