Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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