we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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