morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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