why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
You may now shotgun with the bride
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
