For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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