i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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