Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
