Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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