Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
