Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
The air was thick with penises
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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