We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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