am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
