No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
