I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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