Capitaan dildo arrescate!
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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